WILLY'S BARBECUE

Willy Collins left his bed,
he scratched his head and coughed,
he banged his knee en route to bath,
on ladder to the loft.

Having woken properly,
he made his way downstairs,
anhialated one fried egg
and then a couple of spares.

He burned the toast 'til nearly black
the coffee it was stewed,
the bacon was cremated
'til it just could not be chewed!

Yet when he saw the sunshine
invites sprinkled far and wide,
to join him for a barbecue,
instead of lunch inside.

He asked the widow Smith
and told her she could bring her cat,
but said his Aunties budgie
would be safer in the flat.

He said his brother Ron
could bring the twins if they behaved,
and cousin Suzies hippy friend
as long as he was shaved.

He said he'd cook some chicken
and some ribs if they were spare,
he said there'd be some salads
and some very fancy fare

but some of them had heard
about his prowess with an oven
and thought they'd be much safer
with a cauldron and a coven,

so instead of sharing
chargrilled offerings al fresco,
they thought that they'd be better off
with take-away from Freshco.

But this sorry tale
is not as sad as it may be,
his friends did not desert him,
they invited him for tea

and when they said there may be food,
he gulped upon his pride
and settled for a chicken
that was roasted well inside!